Tuesday, 13 March 2012

touch

random thought here.
we all need touch.

over 25years ago my spouse and I were in a store, when I felt a  warm hand on my back
gently caressing between the shoulder blades. It was soft, gentle and comforting.
It was not my husband.
The other young man had though it was his wife beside him. 
My spouse would never do that.

When I was a wee girl at a summer exibition with my parents I tucked my hand into a tall man standing beside me. I thought it was my dad and was so embarrassed when it turned out to be a stranger. He and my parents smiled over the top of my head and I remember the warm feeling  that it was a memorable moment. His strength and my trusting tiny fingers.

The soft finger touch swirling patterns that my first boyfriend would scroll in my palm.
sexiest touch                           ever.

When I was 16 a car making a left turn smashed into me on my new 20 speed Peugot (no helmets back then) I was thrown headfirst over the handlebars and found myself spread out on the asphalt.Unknown to me an off-duty fireman reached me first (bless you dear sir, 40 years later) for spreading your hand solidly and firmly over mine.
I sucked in your confidence,warmth and comfort.

Several years ago I was deeply,sadly,horribly depressed. Struggling for years and with a GP who just wouldn't refer me to a mental health care provider.             It got worse.   
In fact unmentionable.
Finally
a referal.
At the end of that first visit that doc reached out as my head was bowed, my shoulders burdened and softly touched my hand and said "we can help you".
That one touch cancelled my vow to walk into a remote  field that very night............
I recently mentioned my memory of this to him, and he said he hardly ever does that, "the touch".
damn glad he did it for me & I told him the significance.

Finally, the smell of baby throw up, hot sticky, sweaty chest and neck, damp baby curls
the soft hiccups and gentle sighs of a sick child drifting off to sleep plastered against my chest.
trusting in my  solid warmth.

picking up and protecting a lumpy 6 week old back lab in numerous soft blankies in the middle of a wicked,nasty  November 2010 winter storm. and surprising one of my boys at his university residence. the sheer joy of being able to keep such a secret!


 

those are my memories of touch 

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